Here's The Beef

Something Weird

thebeef — Sun, 04 Jul 2010 08:02:20 +0000

Tonight I was watching Manhunter when a neighbor came up to my screen door asking to use my phone. I told him sure, as long as he doesn’t use it for too long. Having seen this guy around and knowing he lives with my landlord, I let him in. He sat on our loveseat and as I’m handing him my phone I noticed he had a line of dried blood coming out of his ear. He held the phone for a second, pressed some buttons then handed it back to me, put a piece of paper on the coffee table and asked me if I could dial the number at the top of this wrinkled piece of paper for him. I said sure, but I was less concerned about the phone or what was on the paper as making sure he wasn’t going to pull a knife on me–”Do you see?” I dialed a few numbers, checked on him in my periferal vision, finished and hit send. I handed him back the phone and he very delicately brought the phone up to his ear with his ring and pinkie finger sticking out. I know he got blood on it. The call goes to voicemail and he hangs up and gets up to leave, putting the phone on the table. There was smeared, dried blood on the screen. I get up to close the door behind him and notice he’d been wearing a v-neck backwards. Since it was backwards the “front” of the t-shirt was a bit too tight in some spots where a man’s chest and belly normally shouldn’t be. I say goodbye closed the door behind him, locked the deadbolt, closed the curtains, and immediately went looking for any sanitizer in the apartment. Before he left he mentioned that he was moving out. That’s a relief.

Covering the walls

thebeef — Mon, 05 Apr 2010 20:59:33 +0000

Last month, we had a bit of a mold problem in our apartment. My room wasn’t so bad, no worse conditions than I’ve had to endure in the past, but it was still bad enough to get rid of. While the “mold guy” fixed up the place, I had to move some stuff out of my room and sleep in the living room. The result, no mold and a redesign of my room’s layout. I like the way it turned out (with my bed under the window facing the door, and my desk next to my record player and speakers), but the redesign has left a big empty space on one of the walls (between a poster of Animal House and The Texas Chainsaw Massacre). To solve my problem I went online, found some prints of old pulp magazine covers and bought ‘em. Here’s what I got:

Oh, Iron Mike…

thebeef — Wed, 13 Jan 2010 11:17:44 +0000

You don’t have to fuck me, cause I already love you.

Whatever Happened to the Comics of Tomorrow?

thebeef — Mon, 11 Jan 2010 23:35:06 +0000

Last October, Long Beach finally got its own comic convention. This was a huge deal for me as a longtime comic reader/collector and Long Beach resident/lover. Initially wanting to run through the streets gleefully spreading the news, I eventually came to my senses, left my clothes on, and opted for writing an article on the history of comics in the Union Weekly (CSULB’s students’ newspaper). The article ended up being the feature for that week, complete with R. Crumb-esque illustrations of me throughout. My intent was to write something that would allow people completing unfamiliar with the world of comic books to feel comfortable enough after finishing the article to attend a comic convention and not feel completely unaware of what surrounds them. Basically, ingratiate the new and provide an interesting piece for fans. Give it a read and if you feel up to it, pick up a comic when you’re done.

The original article can be seen here: http://issuu.com/theunionweekly/docs/65.05

Whatever Happened to the Comics of Tomorrow?

The Life, Death, and Rebirth of the American Comic Book

by Mike Pallotta

illustrations by Chris Fabela

Back in the ’50s, an evil psychiatrist by the name of Dr. Fredric Wertham almost killed comic books. Wertham deduced, from his own skewed line of thinking, that juvenile delinquency was directly related to comic books, since most kids in juvie at the time said they only read comics. Wertham took his studies and wrote a novel called Seduction of the Innocent (1954), which was a direct attack on comics, going so far as to call Batman a homosexual pedophile for having a boy sidekick (instead of a foster parent who just makes poor decisions). Congress took notice of Wertham’s work and an investigation into the comic industry ensued, bringing writers, artists and publishers alike in front of a panel of government officials to defend their creativity and the effect it was having on the youth of America. What resulted was a complete shift in the industry and what was produced for the next 20-30 years. The Comics Code Authority was enacted, limiting creators in what they were allowed to do.

These sorts of shifts in the industry happen. The Comics Code not only limited what comics could be, but also confined them to kid-friendly content. If there’s a code of conduct created with adolescent readers in mind as the target audience, then the product is going to continuously be created solely for that audience. However, in the late ’70s and ’80s, with most comic readers having come of age and the majority of creators tired of writing the same good guy vs. bad guy story, a revolution in the possibilities of the medium began.

Guys like Alan Moore and Frank Miller injected adult concepts back into comics, simultaneously widening their audience and allowing for stories that had more substance and were less disposable. At the same time, an old pro by the name of Will Eisner (creator of The Spirit–don’t judge the character by the movie) decided to go off and make a memoir set in his hometown of Brooklyn the only way he knew how: in panels. Eisner put faces to his neighborhood. He lit the streets and put cracks in the buildings, and he did it all in one complete book–culminating in the first “graphic novel.” The difference between graphic novels and comic books? They’re interchangeable really, but graphic novels are books with a story that have a beginning and an end, whereas a comic book is more like a TV episode where you’re only getting one installment of a larger story.

Comics then gained the possibility to showcase stories with real human emotion and humor. These slice-of-life stories were, and still are, an escape from the masks and tights that dominate the medium. The industry has come into its own. Walk into a comic shop nowadays, and you’ll find books ranging from American Splendor’s slice-of-life stories that I was just talking about (also check out anything by Adrian Tomine, Craig Thompson, Daniel Clowes, and Jeffrey Brown) to zombies books (The Walking Dead by Robert Kirkman) to hard-boiled pulp books (Criminal by Ed Brubaker) to books that have everything in between (The Goon by Eric Powell).

If you look at the hundreds of comics lining the shelves in any given shop, you’ll notice that the industry is still dominated by superheroes. But that’s just part of the problem; most of these superhero books are just coming out from the two biggest publishers–DC and Marvel. And with Marvel’s recent acquisition by Disney, they’re only going to grow in the market.

Most books put out by DC or Marvel feature established characters that have been around for decades–like Superman or Captain America. If a creator wants to work for one of these companies (the only two that actually provide enough pay to make somewhat of a living), they have to write stories using these established characters, and their work has to be approved by editors, thus hindering the creative process exponentially. Creators will then turn to smaller publishing companies to print the books that they want to write, but these companies can’t afford to print the books that Marvel or DC wouldn’t and eventually fold altogether.

This, of course, limits the quality and quantity of comics coming out, since only a handful of companies are having a say as to what ends up on your comic shop’s shelves. This means less American Splendor and more Superman.

Basically, the economy is doing to comics what Dr. Wertham did in the ’50s. Hopefully, the industry will manage to do well enough to not have to rely solely on selling superhero books or books that cater to the lowest common denominator–WWE and Blue Collar Comedy Tour fans.

In the past few years, creators have finally been fighting against the big companies to gain the rights over characters they created, and they’re winning.

In true comic book fashion, the underdog estates of Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster (the creators of Superman) took corporate giant Time Warner (owner of DC comics) to court over the rights to the character that these two pioneers created over 70 years ago.

Siegel and Shuster initially signed a 10-year-contract with DC (then National Comics) upon the release of Action Comics #1 (the first appearance of Superman). But when the contract was up in the mid-’40s, both Siegel and Shuster realized they weren’t in control of the character anymore and unsuccessfully sued for the rights.

DC was also allowed to retain all the profits from the usage of Superman for themselves. This devastated the two, and they weren’t the only ones this happened to. Bill Finger, co-creator/writer of Batman, had the same thing happen to him, whereas his partner Bob Kane (the original artist of Batman) raked in all the profits. Finger, Siegel, and Shuster all went on to lead lives doing menial jobs, living in squalor, and–in Finger’s case–wasting away on a bar stool. Siegel and Shuster sued Time Warner multiple times to no avail over the course of their lives.

The good news? Siegel and Shuster’s families’ recent legal battle with Time Warner broke new ground with the families regaining many of the rights to Superman–a pop culture icon that has made billions for Time Warner. The rights revert back to the estates in 2013–leaving the licensing of Superman up to their discretion. The heirs can decide whether Superman will be public domain or if he’ll stay at DC.

DC isn’t the only company to completely screw over their creators either. Marvel went years without paying artist Jack Kirby (co-creator of the Fantastic Four, Captain America, Hulk, the X-men, etc.) his just deserves and now his estate is suing Marvel for many of the rights to his creations–many of which have gone on to make Marvel millions when adapted for the big screen.

While aging creators and the estates of creators are fighting to regain rights to their characters, current comic professionals are making sure to work with companies that’ll let them print their books and keep the rights to their stories. Robert Kirkman, current writer and creator of such titles as Invincible and The Walking Dead, went to Image Comics to publish his titles. Image is a company that lets their writers and artists keep the rights to any properties that are published through them. This not only gives writers/artists possible financial success with their creations, but also complete quality control over their books. Kirkman and others like him are part of the solution.

With comics being scanned onto the Internet (legally and illegally), comics created specifically for the internet (Penny Arcade and Zuda), and the availability of graphic novels at places other than comic shops (Barnes & Noble), readership is higher than ever. However, less and less money is going into the industry, since people aren’t buying these books.

Consumers are now just downloading or browsing and not purchasing. Reading comics online is fine, but it doesn’t compare to holding the product in your hand. So make a trip to your local comic shop (or Barnes & Noble, if you’re too scared) and browse.

If you need to judge books by their covers, then do it. That’s why they make those covers so fancy. If you need to ask the clerk for suggestions, then do it (but if they’re weird, don’t let it deter you). Just pick up some books and see what you like. If you like superhero movies, then start with some superhero books. If you like documentaries, then start with some memoir graphic novels. And if you like good television, then start with Y: The Last Man. From there you can begin to follow writers/artists who you like, and know which writers/artists to ignore. But the important thing to do is to start.

Stuck in my head

thebeef — Mon, 11 Jan 2010 04:53:17 +0000

I’ve been mumbling this song to myself for days. I love it.

When lit nerds write comics

thebeef — Fri, 08 Jan 2010 09:02:32 +0000

I’ve never been a big Deadpool fan, but I liked this moment.

New Glasses

thebeef — Thu, 07 Jan 2010 00:36:03 +0000

Look! I’m so indie! Cause they were $40 and they’re HUGE!

I actually really like them a lot.

Okay too many photos! This is starting to turn into a fashion blog (and not a Fashawn blog–which I’d probably check out).

Anyways, when I wear the glasses I’m kinda reminded of this guy:

What do YOU think blog reader!?!

Bored?

thebeef — Tue, 05 Jan 2010 07:03:09 +0000

Wanna watch some really fucking good, new TV? Well check out this new BBC show Misfits. It’s only six episodes long, so it’ll be over before you can even bother to stop the video. Seriously, everything about this show is good: the acting, the music, the style they shoot it, the story, and especially the characters. It’s all top notch and original. At least give this 9:48 video a shot (it’s the first part of the first episode).

My Top 10 Movies of 2009

thebeef — Tue, 05 Jan 2010 05:19:33 +0000

I know you’ve been sitting around bored saying to yourself, “FUCK, what movies did Beef like the most last year?” Well, even though I didn’t get a chance to see everything I wanted to last year (Hurt Locker, Food Inc.), here’s my top 10 picks of 2009 (in no particular order).

Away We Go

District 9

Moon

Anvil

Where The Wild Things Are

Inglourious Basterds

Up in the Air

Star Trek

Black Dynamite

Honorable Mentions: World’s Greatest Dad, Drag Me to Hell, Adventureland, Paranormal Activity, Funny People

Guy Talk: Tattoos

thebeef — Mon, 04 Jan 2010 08:21:04 +0000

Me and Joe are just a couple of guys. Both 23, both single (at heart) and both with secret desires to get tattoos. I recently sat down on the internet with my ol’ pal Joe (we were together on 9/11 so our bond runs true and deep) and discussed my want to get a tattoo and how in the past couple days I’ve realized what tattoos I’m finally going to get. The first of which being a door that’s opened and inside the doorframe is space (a la Twilight Zone), and the second, my arm as if it were battle damaged and underneath the torn, bloody skin is a cyborg arm. Joe, in turn, divulges his longtime want to get a t-rex fighting an octopus. Anyways, if you ever wanted to know what two guy-dudes like us talk about when we talk about tattoos, well here you go:

11:28pmJoe

if you got the door, where would you put it?

11:29pmMichael

probably on the side of my torso

left probably

11:30pmJoe

that’s cool

i imagine it looking kinda 80s sci-fi

if that makes any sense

big planets kinda bunched up close, that sorta thing

11:32pmMichael

hold on i’ll grab an image online

http://www.serviceelevator.com/images/TZ_door.gif

just like that only the door will be open

11:32pmJoe

twilight zone-ish

11:32pmMichael

no planets just stars

11:33pmJoe

i don’t know why i didn’t make that connection before

11:33pmMichael

very photo-realistic

11:33pmJoe

that’s cool

so you’re gonna do this then. you’ve decided?

11:34pmMichael

yeah basically the door from the twilight zone opening

pretty much

i’ve always had a secret desire to get a tattoo

and this is funny, it’s twilight zone, it’s space, it’s sci-fi without be TOO sci-fi

and it’s an excuse to pull up my shirt

11:36pmJoe

and we all know you love to do that

yeah, i think if i ever got the t-rex octo it would be either on my back or on my forearm

11:37pmMichael

i see it as starting on your back and then coming up and over onto your forearm

11:37pmJoe

like the tentacles reaching up the arm and the t-rex is on the back?

cuz that’s actually kind of cool

11:38pmMichael

tentacles wrapping around your forearm and such

11:39pmJoe

hey, that is pretty rad

shit

i think you’re selling me on my own idea by improving it

11:41pmMichael

yeah the t-rex would be coming over your shoulder and the main fight would be on your bicep and then tentacles would also be going down and wrapping around your arm

11:41pmJoe

yeah, that’s pretty fucking cool

i wish tattoos weren’t so expensive

11:42pmMichael

i’m selling myself on the idea that i’m a guy with tattoos

or a guy that should have tattoos anyways

11:43pmJoe

haha yeah. the door idea is growing on me

especially when you think about the twilight zone connection

11:43pmMichael

yeah the money is the problem

i’ve always said, if i just had more money, i’d look a lot better

11:44pmJoe

haha, i don’t know if tattoos make you look better

also, it’s not like you look bad

11:44pmMichael

i’m just worried about changing shape

11:45pmJoe

yeah, that’s my main concern about a tattoo

well, other than the money

11:46pmMichael

but i figured if i get stretch marks i’ll just have the tattoo artist turn them into wolverine slashes

11:46pmJoe

hahahahaha

jesus

11:47pmMichael

yeah and sci-fi tats might not be a bad idea cause if i lose weight (or gain weight) they’ll just look like cool warped sci-fi shit

11:48pmJoe

haha jesus

that all is pretty solid reasoning

11:49pmMichael

yep it’s not like i’m getting someone’s face

11:49pmJoe

well yeah, a face is just creepy too

esp. if you consider sex. i mean…that’s just fucking weird

the battle damaged one is easily the funniest, but also the dumbest

but i like the door idea too

11:51pmMichael

okay

just so you know i’m gonna start off light though

11:53pmMichael

i’m gonna get wings on my back and in the middle of them it’s gonna say BREATHE in cursive

11:53pmJoe

that’s just awful

11:55pmMichael

and then i was gonna get my last name done in sanskrit across my lower back

11:55pmJoe

fuck

haha

11:56pmMichael

so if you know of any good sanskrit tattoo artists let me know

11:56pmJoe

this is a whole new level of irony

yeah, i’ll uh…keep an eye out

11:56pmMichael

okay good

alright i’m gonna go read, i’ve been spending way too much money on comics

11:57pmJoe

yeah, you’ve gotta put some of that shit aside for a tattoo fund

alright man, i’ll talk to you later

by the way, you should read generation kill

11:58pmMichael

totes

11:58pmJoe

it’s pretty fucking interesting

totes mcgoats

11:59pmMichael

yeah i was thinking about getting it

oh and i’m goona post a portion of this on my blog

11:59pmJoe

or you can just borrow mine. whichever. but it’s worth reading.

cool, i’ll be internet not-famous.

oh hey, btw, i’m starting up my blog again

but whatever

12:01amMichael

don’t belittle my blog

yeah whatever BYE

come back soon!

END! Wasn’t that a really gay conversation (especially if you read it in the voice of Buddy Cole)? And what do you think of my tattoo ideas blog reader?